How You Fit Into Your Partner’s Life

by Jan Spiller


Brad Pitt Born in Shawnee, OK at 06:31 on 1963-12-18
Angelina Jolie Born in Los Angeles, CA at 09:09 on 1975-06-04



Introduction 1
Igniting the Flow of Love 2
Potential Areas of Concern 3
Best Approach 4
Past-Life Influences 5
Conclusion 6


This report, based on where your North Node falls in a significant other’s birth chart, describes the gifts that you are bringing to this person. By becoming aware of the special gifts that you are destined to give them, you can more easily activate the flow of Love in your relationship. As you consciously act to bring them your gifts, they will become more aware of you, and the flow of Love and appreciation between you will be stimulated.

In the process of consciously giving these gifts, the best in you is also evoked and strengthened. When you benefit someone in a specific area of their life, they simultaneously begin to benefit you in that same area. For example, if your North Node falls in another’s 10th House and you are a helpful influence in terms of their profession, regardless of the placement of their North Node in your chart, they will also be a positive influence in your profession.

So in a way there are two gifts: the gift another is destined to give you through their North Node placement, and the reciprocal support they will give you simply because you are giving it to them!



Because your North Node is in Angelina’s 12th HOUSE, you are bringing her the gifts of:

Solitude and Serenity

With your North Node in Angelina’s 12th House, the Universe has brought you across her path because she is ready to embrace a more mystical awareness of life. Your purpose is to support and empower Angelina’s ability to tap her own inner wellspring of inspiration. On a deep level, she has signaled her need for rest and solitude in order to reestablish the importance of her own inner life. Your energy and presence will naturally enable Angelina to get the respite she needs.

In some way, you help create an environment for Angelina that relieves her of the daily grind of working at a job in order to survive, and encourages her to maintain a more inward focus. Even if Angelina works with you, mystical or spiritual principles will likely be at the basis of the job or workplace philosophy, and you will support her in taking the time she needs to re-charge and approach projects from a place of inner calm and creativity.

Encourage Angelina to relax, spend time by herself, and build inner strength. When you see that she is stressed or anxious, persuade her to take some quiet time to sort things out. This part of herself needs to be supported in order for her personality to become healthier and more balanced.

You will be a good influence on any of Angelina’s projects that require time alone: artistic pursuits, learning a musical instrument, writing projects, etc. You naturally support her in the kind of creativity that can only come from having enough time alone to tap into a connection with invisible forces. Have confidence in your ability to assist and nurture Angelina in this way, and don’t hesitate to nudge her in the direction of developing her own talents by working in solitude.



We all have subconscious reflexes resulting from our history (from this life and from past lives) that affect how we live – habits that sabotage us and undermine our effectiveness in the world. These are often hidden influences – or at least hidden from us. So we approach something we desire with a sense of fear that causes erratic behavior or excessive inhibition, or we encounter a block that defeats us from attaining the prize we seek.

Because your North Node falls in Angelina’s 12th House, your gift is to help her release and heal some of these disturbances in her psyche. You are aware of how Angelina is sabotaging herself: what she is repressing, avoiding expressing, or expressing in an indirect way. And you have the ability to point it out to her in a way that helps her to see it. Once Angelina becomes aware of these patterns, she can begin to act consciously to change her behavior. Also, you are likely to view these behaviors as a lack of trust on her part. By discussing these issues with Angelina in the context of trusting Life, you can help her become aware of – and relax – these negative reactions.

For example, my North Node falls in a friend’s 12th House. I automatically became keenly aware of him in situations involving money because he has a lot of self-sabotaging behavior in this area. I noticed that he’s either totally cheap, or he spends money like there’s no tomorrow. He’s imbalanced with money, and so he’s always anxious about experiencing a lack of money. I mentioned this pattern to his wife, who gained insights about how she can work with his financial anxiety in a positive way.

You will be aware of Angelina’s hidden strengths as well as her weaknesses, so don’t hesitate to nudge her a bit by pointing out the importance of using her strengths to further her goals. Help Angelina become aware of her hidden talents and encourage her in these areas. As you consciously give Angelina the gift of Love by helping her see her strengths and become aware of the ways she has been sabotaging herself, her appreciation creates an opening for greater depth in your relationship.


Spiritual Trust and Surrender

Life has brought you across Angelina’s path to help her increase her ability to surrender to her unconscious and develop her connection with the higher Spiritual Power that supports her life. It’s time for Angelina to shift her focus from preoccupation with the material world and the necessity of taking care of endless details, to a greater awareness of – and trust in – these unseen Universal forces. And in order to release her anxieties and build her trust in a Higher Power, she must have quiet time alone for rest and inner attunement.

Your gift is to help Angelina awaken to a more mystical or metaphysical approach to life. Through your influence and example you nurture her in building trust that there are positive spiritual forces at work that will support her in coping with the difficult situations she encounters in daily life. You can contribute to Angelina’s success in connecting with her Higher Power by encouraging her to take the down time she needs to rest and rejuvenate.

Be interested in Angelina’s ideas about trust and her viewpoint regarding reliance on spiritual forces or a positive Higher Power. As you draw her out in order to better understand her beliefs concerning spirituality, she will get more in touch with what she actually does believe. Your interest in this dimension of Angelina’s life will help her become stronger in her faith and bolster her belief that there is a power she can rely on for help in her darker moments.

When difficulties or upsets arise for Angelina, you can reinforce her faith by reminding her: “Life is on your side. Something good will come out of this.” Or: “All is well. . . somehow, everything is unfolding properly.” The idea is to help her shift from a preoccupation with the details of the specific situation to a feeling of surrender and trust that a positive Higher Power is guiding her life in the right direction.

You might also give Angelina this gift just by pointing out examples of how this guidance works and of events unfolding as they should. For instance, if you needed a clerical assistant and happened to meet one in the elevator, in recounting the incident to Angelina you could say: “Life is so amazing. . . I needed an assistant, and just happened to use the elevator at the right time and found the perfect person for the job.”

Your presence is also a positive influence on Angelina’s psychological health. You can validate her gift of sensitivity in a way that strengthens her and helps her use it to her advantage, rather than suppressing her awareness of the more subtle forces at work in a situation. For example, if you notice Angelina is hypersensitive to disharmony in relationships, you can point it out to her in a way that gives her confidence in her superior ability to create harmony through her attunement to disharmony.

You have come across Angelina’s path because she needs more trust in a Higher Power and increased confidence that everything in life is working out according to Divine Order. When you give Angelina this gift of Love, her appreciation will open a channel which allows greater love to flow between you. This process also brings out the best in you, and reminds you to trust in the goodness of Life’s guiding forces.



Life has brought you across Angelina’s path because, on some deep level, she has asked for help in having more down time for reflecting on prior events in a way that deepens her capacity for compassion – towards herself and others – and brings her serenity. Life is about balance. If we become too preoccupied in the mundane details of life, we become perfectionistic and critical – toward ourselves and others – in a way that can be debilitating. Support Angelina in further developing her sense of compassion and trust in a Higher Power by encouraging her to pursue activities that help her relax, such as meditation, time alone, or spiritual or artistic pursuits.

You are helpful through your deep understanding of Angelina and your compassion for her behavioral “glitches.” Your love and understanding of who she is, is the best healing influence. You don’t even have to say anything, and Angelina will feel your deep understanding and acceptance of her and begin to feel more confidence in the natural flow of life. This helps her to become less critical of herself and more compassionate towards others.

You are also aware of any desires she has to be of service to those who are needy, ill, imprisoned, handicapped, or emotionally disturbed. Actively support her abilities to make a difference where she can. The process of admiring and nurturing Angelina’s compassion for people in need brings out the best in you, while strengthening this trait in her.



When you turn on a lamp that is plugged into an electrical outlet, you are pulling power from one place (the power lines coming into the home) and rerouting it to another (the lamp). And in this same way, in the process of bringing Angelina the gift of supporting her reliance on a Higher Power, you drain energy from her ability to work and organize her time so she can be productive in the world. Because you are so tuned into her need for rest, you are likely to feel reticent about putting too much work on her shoulders.

You will inadvertently give Angelina bad advice about work, how to organize herself, or about her health. She will feel this and tend to not listen to what you say in these areas. For example, if you tell Angelina how to get organized and how to get her life together, it is likely to be bad advice for her every time she follows it. Also, you will probably not give her good advice about what doctors she should see.

Even with the best of intentions, you are likely to say the wrong thing to Angelina if you try to support her on a mundane level. So, especially if this is a long-term relationship, your best bet is to stay out of the way of her ideas for how to organize herself, and support her in working with others who can more effectively help her with issues involving her work and organizational skills.

I had a client whose North Node was in her son’s 12th House. He suffered from Attention Deficient Disorder (ADD) and needed help in focusing. He wouldn’t listen to his mother about how to get organized, but he did listen to his father (whose North Node was in his 6th House), and accepted his suggestions for ordering his life in a way he could manage. It wasn’t personal – his father’s suggestions about routine and planning just worked for him.

However, his mother felt left out. So I suggested that she begin giving her son confidence that he could trust a Higher Force to help guide his life. And as she began giving the gifts of her North Node in his 12th House, a new connection of Love opened between them. He instinctively felt that she was giving him the gift he needed from her, and so he received it with appreciation and love.



Although your influence will help Angelina recognize her self-sabotaging behaviors, it’s better that you don’t approach her with any kind of plan for making specific corrections. No matter how skilled you are at counseling or assisting others in analyzing and improving their situations, this kind of input from you simply won’t work with Angelina. She will resist your helpful suggestions about how to organize herself, and discount your ideas about how to correct her behavior. Angelina seems to instinctively recognize that your purpose in her life is to connect her with serenity and compassion, not perfectionism.

The best way for you to connect with Angelina is by saying things that give her confidence that a Higher Power is on her side, helping and protecting her. For example, I had a client whose North Node fell in her daughter’s 12th House. It seemed that no matter what she did or said, she was unable to establish a line of communication that her daughter interpreted as being supportive. Finally, she noticed that whenever her daughter became lost in anxieties, the only thing she could say that seemed to help was: “I’m sending positive thought to the universe that good things will come to you out of this situation.”

Whenever you don’t know how to help Angelina, simply reassert your confidence that everything is going to work out for her. For example, if Angelina asks you what she should do about her job situation, your best bet would be to listen to her with attention and empathy, and give her confidence that she will intuitively know what to do when the time comes. Put her back in touch with the vision she would like to manifest.

You are in Angelina’s life to put her in touch with Universal Forces that can guide what comes from beyond creating order in the material world. If she resists your gift of helping her connect with a Higher Power, your best bet is to validate her need for order and predictability, and then focus on the benefits of trust and surrender. For example: “I realize that you enjoy having strong routines that give you a sense of order. And I think that if we also set aside time to focus on the bigger picture and consciously flow with events as they’re unfolding, the process will magically protect and guide our lives and our relationship will feel more joyful.”

Your gift of helping Angelina to remember her own spiritual connection – that life is watching out for her – can restore her inner calm. From that calm and trust, the practical answers Angelina is seeking in her daily life will come to her. Also, reminding her that “all is well and everything is unfolding as it should” brings out the best in you. Angelina will respond by receiving and appreciating your gift and this opens a channel for greater Love to flow between you.



In a past incarnation, you had a relationship with Angelina that involved work and striving for perfection. This somehow resulted in a traumatic event that is still affecting her subconsciously in this lifetime. If it was a job- or career-related situation, you may have given her so many tasks and responsibilities that she lost touch with needing to take time to recharge and reconnect with her inner strength.

Another possibility is that you may have encouraged Angelina’s work and publicized her image of perfection with others to the extent that her ego took over and she lost touch with her inner Light. You may even have urged her to create a pretense of perfection at the expense of her principles, hiding the truth within herself. It may not even be that the trauma so much happened at your hands, as that at the moment of death Angelina held you in her thoughts as being partly responsible.

Regardless of the specific scenario, it is unresolved karma, and you are uniquely equipped – just through your interactions with her – to put Angelina directly in touch with these self-sabotaging patterns that lead to her not getting what she wants in life. Once she becomes aware of these patterns, the healing can begin. For this to transpire, you will naturally encourage Angelina to spend a lot of time alone so that she can have the privacy she needs to process the past and reconnect with her Higher Power. Because of your past-life connection, you can be an instrument of her healing and, in the process, any psychic scars you may be carrying from past lifetimes with this Soul will also be healed.



What goes around, comes around. The more you effectively benefit those around you, the more comes back to you. The deeper secret though, is to give for the joy of giving – for the flowering you see occurring in the other person’s life. Only then is it possible to give without attachment to the results of your giving.

© Jan Spiller; much of the above material is included as part of Jan Spiller’s book Cosmic Love.
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Other Love Reports by Jan Spiller

To discover the gifts that your partner is bringing into your life, and how to consciously receive them to open the channel of Love between you, we recommend the report Destiny’s Rewards Through Important Relationships.

To find out about your PARTNER’S North Node, and how you can support them on their path, we recommend the report How To Help Your Partner Grow.